Wednesday, April 15, 2020

The Great Junk-Food Smack-down

Hi, Duffy Brown here and with being stuck at home I am eating way too many snacks. My goal is to finish them off then to buy no more. But until then…
So what I’m talking about today is the The Great Junk-food Smack-down
I’ve read the articles, listed to my doc go on and on about nutrition, listed to my kids preach at me about what I should eat but sometimes I just want a real cookie. Or hot dog. Or bag of chips. Not some fat-free, soy-based health food in disguise. Blah!
So at great peril I set out to find the best-tasting genuine junk food. 

After chowing down on 20 packages of goodies (and probably around 10,000 calories), and deciding that picking up extra Zumba classes was worth it I came up with a list. 
Doritos! The cheesy chips are a Super Bowl party staple and a solid companion to a PB & J. The classic nacho flavor will forever reign as a snack-time favorite, but the best part is the collection of flavors like Cool Ranch, All Nighter Cheeseburger and Blazin' Buffalo & Ranch. 


And then there’s Snickers!!!!! Holy crap! I am such a Snickers fan. It’s the number one candy bar with more than 15 million bars being produced every single day. That's a whole lot of peanuts — 99 tons of them, to be exact. Pass the Snickers!

And then there’s those pork rind things. Not my personal fav but hey if it’s junk food I’m a fan. Take the fatty skin of a pig and fry it in yet more fat. The hot-oil bath balloons the rinds to more than five times their original size. Pork rinds have no carbs and top the charts in protein, making them hardly a junk food in my book. 
French Fries! Being honest FF are indeed junk food. Trying to assign some nutritional value to them is just plain lying. And IMO the best of the best is Mickey-Ds. There's something magical about those golden tubers extending from the bright red McDonald's fry box. 
Though cops in particular get a bad rap for their doughnut consumption, this form of fried dough is loved everywhere. Glazed or topped with sugar, sometimes filled with jam or custard, their most iconic shape is the round ring (though the holes themselves are really great). Despite the number of American chains like Dunkin' Donuts and Krispy Kreme, Canada actually has more doughnut shops per capita than any other country. Yea, Canada!

Moon Pies! A Southern treat!! They come in chocolate, vanilla and banana, and are such a Southern staple that since 2008, Mobile, Ala., has dropped a 12-ft. mechanical moon pie to ring in the New Year!
There are few experiences more American than finding your fingers covered in sticky orange dust, the inevitable result of a cheesy-puff snack attack. Cheese puffs are a puffed-corn snack that also comes in ball and curls. Most famous are Cheetos featuring Chester Cheetah, the cheesiest cartoon cat of all time.
Of course there is the all-time fav junk food…cookies and chocolate chip is the king of cookies…or Oreo! Bring on the milk!
As much as we love it, pepperoni pizza is junk. Delicious, greasy, gooey junk. The grain is enriched, the cheese is piled on and the meat is highly processed. It's easy to see how pizza takes a turn from health food to junk food. But hey, I’m so not complaining.  A beer and pepperoni pizza! Bring it on. 
Okay, these are my favs…what’s yours? When you gotta have junk what do you splurge on.
Hugs, Duffy
Duffy Brown
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3 comments:

Diane Garland said...

I adore junk food! I've had to cut back my consumption as the gym is closed, but I can still be found eying the pantry and shelves in the grocery store. LOL Peanut M&Ms are one of my downfalls along with Hershey Hugs and the tiny Reeces. Salt and vinegar potato chips with Utz being my favorite brand. My hubby and I have taken to snacking on dry cereal (cinnamon Life right now) and sunflower seeds to give us our time to munch without quite so many calories.

Rachelle21 said...

I have been eating Passover snacks. Fruit jells and chocolate-covered jelly. I just made a matzo pizza with cheese, pasta sauce, and anchovies. I do not like very spicy food so I do not eat pepperoni nor pastrami.

Anonymous said...

Love your blog!

My downfall is Clancy's Kettle Chips, found at Aldi grocery stores and I haven't had one since the beginning of March, my token resistance to being "bad".

Though this resistance got shot down with my Easter surprise from my guy, yep, a barrel Utz Cheese Balls, oh my!
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