Friday, January 4, 2019

Why can't I ever find my glasses?

by Lorraine Bartlett / Lorna Barrett / L.L. Bartlett

When I was younger, I was near-sighted. I wore glasses to drive, when I went to the movies, yada-yada-yada. eyes did a switcheroo. Now, I no longer need glasses to drive, go to the movies, yada-yada-yada. Now, I need them to read.

When I wore glasses to drive, etc. I had ONE pair and somehow, I never lost them. I could never eat with them on, but I wore them quite a bit of the time, and somehow when I'd put them down, I would always find them.

Those days are gone.

Now, I have at least ten pairs of "cheaters" and they're scattered all around the house. The funny thing is ... I often have to  hunt for a pair. I have scattered little relish dishes around the house so that I can keep a pair of glasses in them and they are supposed to live in that room. (Kitchen, dining room, living room, etc.) Unfortunately, I have a habit of putting them on and wearing them to my next destination. Therefore, I often have six or seven pairs sitting on my desk when I'm in the living room trying to read the daily paper (or a book or magazine). Get up, hunt, find, sit down. I do a lot of that.

Mr. L suggested I get chain to attach to a pair of glasses.

Ha! No way. Only OLD LADIES and librarians wear glasses on chains around their necks.

Not so, Mr. L reminded me. Magnum P.I. (the ORIGINAL Magnum that is) often wore his sunglasses on a cord.


Nope. Wasn't gonna do it.

After my mother passed away, I came across a chain and a cord for hanging glasses amongst her things. I took them home and let them sit...for three years.

One day this past fall, I was so frustrated from my glasses hunt that I searched out those hangers.

*Sigh* I guess I'm now old, because I end up wearing one or the other of those glasses most days. That doesn't mean I don't take them off and misplace them, because I do--and a couple of times a day.  (I guess I really just don't like wearing glasses.)

Does this happen to you? Do you have a solution? If so, please share!

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