Monday, October 31, 2016


By Mary Kennedy                              
If my purse could talk, it wouldn't have very nice things to say about me. I usually am too lazy to change purses with the seasons, so I end up carrying a massive, dark heavy bag in July (with faux fur trim, yet!) and a glossy white purse in December. Yes, sheer laziness, I know!
Why do I hate to change purses? Because my purse is always a mess. I recall what Sister Mary Catherine said all those years ago in Catholic convent school. "A cluttered purse is the sign of a cluttered mind." Oh dear, I fear Sister MC was right!
I went to a political event tonight and actually transferred (some!) of the contents of my huge satchel into a smart little black Coach bag. It was no easy task.                                  
There is some immutable law of Physics at work here. When you take everything OUT of your bag, you will discover there is no way it will fit back in! Try it the next time you change purses, and you will see what I mean.
Some women get around the problem by carrying a massive bag. Seriously, they carry a bag the size of an airline carry-on! It's insane. Anything that big should have wheels!
One thing Sister Mary Catherine suggested (which I did NOT take to heart!) was to carry a clear plastic purse. HUH? Seriously? I think the idea was that we would be "shamed" by everyone seeing how messy our purses were. An exercise in masochism, if you ask me! (Don't tell Sister I said that, please!)
        One of my friends always has a neat bag and she seems to keep everything useful in it. Want a breath mint? She's got one. A safety pin? She has a complete miniature sewing kit for repairs. Spilled a little spaghetti sauce on your white sweater? No worries, she has a bleach pen.  Plus a selection of tiny notebooks, color coded post-it and ball point pens for those times when you simply MUST write something down. (True confession time, she was horrified to see me making a note in lipstick on the back of a napkin.) What can I say? Guilty as charged.
I just don't have her organizational skills. She was probably BORN carrying a neat purse.  (Like Queen Elizabeth who has carried the same handbag for over five decades! I always wonder what's inside.)                                                
Let's face it, some women carry way too much in their purse. They seem to tote their whole lives around. Look at this purse. Really--when's the last time you needed a bottle of hair conditioner at work. I don't think so!
 I did an informal poll and most of my friends confessed they fell into the "messy purse" category. So I'm not alone in my slovenly ways.
  And if  you happen to DROP a messy purse, well, we all know what a disaster that can be!  Your untidy habits are there for the whole world to see! 
So maybe Sister Mary Catherine was right. I try to tell myself that "creative types" tend to be disorganized (Nonsense! Sister MC would say. It was very hard to put anything past her.)
How about you? Do you change purses with the seasons? And if someone peeked into your purse, what would they find? 
 More true confessions. Besides all the wadded up grocery store coupons, half used up lipsticks, coins, business cards and slips of paper, I found a half eaten peanut butter sandwich. Yes, a sandwich! It was hard and dense as a sequoia. How long had it been there? Who knows? Months, I would guess.
If you have any organizational tips for me, I would love to hear them. Or just a funny story about what you found when you cleaned out your purse!
Mary Kennedy

No comments: