Friday, May 24, 2013

Down came a spider ...

by Lorraine Bartlett / Lorna Barrett / L.L. Bartlett

On way too many nights, I seem to lie awake for hours on end. Sometimes I stare at the ceiling ... and often I open a book.  Many times it's the SAME book:  The Egg and I.  It's one of my "comfort reads" and has been since I was a tween. (One of our elderly neighbors loaned me the book on a hot summer day when I was BORED to tears. I liked the book so much, she gave it to me.)

So there I was the other night, reading yet another chapter in the book when -- EKKKK!  A spider dropped down from the ceiling and DROPPED ON MY HAND!!!!!

Well, I admit it.  I'm a chicken. I did what any self-respecting woman would do:  I SCREAMED!  That awakened Mr. L and all three of our cats, who were slumbering in heavenly peace. Three cats bolted upright and Mr. L started almost upright.  "What's going on?  What's going on?"

Well, when I screamed, the spider went flying onto the floor.  I leapt out of bed and grabbed a tissue from the box, trying to squash the little bugger, who was one of those black spiders that like to run REALLY, REALLY Fast, and this little (well, actually--the size of a Buick)guy ran around and around in circles. I screamed a few more times and finally squashed the thing.

Whew!

I looked around and then got into bed.  We all settled down once again and I turned the page in my book.

Less than five minutes later -- IT HAPPENED AGAIN!  Another spider DROPPED ON ME!

Scream.  Leap out of bed.  Scream. Grab tissue ... yada yada yada.

My tiny son (also known as my cat Fred), jumped down from the bed and this time fled...for the rest of the night.

After I dispatched this arachnoid to to spider heaven, I got into bed and remembered a part of the book where Ms. MacDonald recounted her nightly trips to the outhouse.  She could either bring a lantern with her (she was recounting her days during the late 1920s on a Chicken Ranch) and attract all kinds of insects, bats, etc., or sit in the dark and wonder what in the world was crawling over her.

I turned off the light and it took a LONG time before I fell back asleep ... but at least if anything dropped from the ceiling, I didn't know about it.

How do you react to surprise visits from icky bugs?

16 comments:

Barbara Thompson said...

I scream and jump up to find something to kill them. I hate any kind of icky bugs!
Barbara Thompson
barbmaci61(at)yahoo(dot)com

Anonymous said...

Barbara, you a woman after my own heart!

Elaine Klingbeil said...

Ha ha! I arrived here at our cabin Sunday evening and see this huge spider on the wall in the bedroom. I go to kill it and it crawls down the wall behind something. I see it on the floor and try again. Then it crawled behind/into the baseboard heater. Now I can't kill it! I went and found a can of spray and sprayed the heater and the floor and wall around it. And I prayed that it would not come find me when I was in bed. So far I have not seen it again so I sure hope it is either dead or decided this was NOT a good place to be.

Anonymous said...

Lorraine, you are much braver than I. First step..jump out of bed screaming, next kill said ofensive critter. When attacked by second spider, turn on lights, check ceiling (as that usually means a nest broke), check cat, check husband. If all else fails..go sleep on couch until process can be done in daylight.
I used to be good with critters, but that died when I crossed The Mason Dixon Border to move back to N.J.
As a side note: We now have something called a cricket/spider. Yes, hidious as it's name.

Maggie Sefton said...

Ackkkkk! I would have done exactly the same thing. Scream, jump from bed, grab tissue, chase, squash. During the day I try to drop them outside, but dropping on me in middle of the night. . No way. Zero tolerance.

Anonymous said...

Spiders won't hurt you. You could pick it up on a piece of paper and just put it outside. No need to smoosh the poor dudes, or even to scream.

Laura W said...

I would react exactly as you did. Even worse are centipedes. They really freak me out. Yuck!

Dru said...

the same way you did...I scream.

Sue said...

Spiders are my least favorite of all creatures---I would do exactly as you with the screaming and getting out of bed---but would make the husband chase and kill it.

Anonymous said...

Having worked with MSDS for years (material safety data sheets -- which tell you everything nasty about a product), I'm not a fan of bug spray. Squishing is hard on the nerves, but doesn't poison me or the cats. That said, I think a baseball bat would have been a good thing to squish that horrible spider that was menacing you. Of course, some of them run VERY fast--much faster than us. You were very brave, Elaine.

Anonymous said...

Um...I did contemplate heading for the couch ....

Anonymous said...

My aunt does that. I don't think I inherited that bravery gene.

Anonymous said...

Won't work in my house. Husband seems to be more afraid of spiders than me. But he does NOT like the screaming part. He's not very handy with the fly swat, either. It's up to me to get rid of bugs. (He just leaves the room and hopes they go away.)

Anonymous said...

See, this is why we are blog SISTERS.

Aurian said...

There is only one answer to that Lorraine, and that is screaming. A few weeks ago we were driving with the windows open (one of the rare nice days) and a small spider suddenly crawled on me. I screamed, and my boyfriend went very angry with me. Luckily, we stood still for a traffic light. But the screaming is just second nature for me, can't help it.
And catching a spider? no way. Bug spray girl here.

Anonymous said...

Yabba-dabba-doo! Here's how Wilma dealt with the original Arachnosaurus:

http://spiderhugger.com/?p=407