Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Erma Bombeck, I Miss You!

by Deb Baker/Hannah Reed

Erma, the American humorist, wrote sharp, funny, one-liners, had a syndicated column that appeared in 900 papers, and was the author of numerous books dealing with family life - husbands, in-laws, kids, the neighbors - drawing from her own experience as a housewife and mother.

While we were dealing with all of life's drama - wayward kids, knuckle-headed spouses, battle armed mother-in-laws, she made us laugh instead of cry.

Some of my favorite quotes by Erma:

"I haven't trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I've never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex."

"Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people's children and publicly admit they can do better are asking for it."

"A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest."

"Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone?"

"Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely."

"God created man, but I could do better."

And finally, before she died in 1996:

"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me.'"

Thank you, Erma, for everything! I miss you.
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