Friday, May 27, 2011

Pulling Up

By Heather Webber / Heather Blake

It’s that time of year. Bathing suit season. Commercials are full of products that want to help us get in shape, lose pounds, buy their stuff. (Btw, does anyone else hate that Schick Quattro commercial where the women are running by the shrubs that get magically trimmed back? I. HATE. IT. –But I digress).

This time of year always reminds me how out of shape I am. I’m small, yes, but have absolutely no muscle tone. I really need to start working out more. Well—ha!—working out, period.

That mindset is what had me standing in son #2’s bedroom, looking at his Iron Gym pull-up bar. Contemplating using it. Trying to figure out how it fits on the doorframe. Some upper body strength would be nice. Shape the triceps, biceps, any kind of ceps...

I get the thing on the door, take a deep breath, grab on, and pull. Up.

Nothing happens. I hang. Down. Gravity at its finest.

I pull again.

Nope, nothing. Though the dangling is starting to burn one of my ceps (not sure which one).

So, I do what any rational out-of-shape person would do. I take the thing down, put it back where I found it, and go in search of a Reece’s Peanut Butter cup.

I’m thinking about taking up yoga next. There’s no pulling up in that, is there? Anyone have any workout routines you recommend for a lazy, out-of-shape writer?

21 comments:

Booklady said...

Zumba is fun! And it's like dancing, maybe you can trick yourself into thinking it's not really a work out.

Aimee said...

Oh, Heather, friend of my heart, yoga is sadly not the workout for the lazy ... as I too once assumed.

Yoga is not the lovely, lying down, resting, lightly stretching relaxing time I had seen pictured in magazines or on websites.

That is how the lure you in. Then they make you do horribly difficult things that not only require coordination, strength, flexibility but an iron will to keep from collapsing on your mat in hysterics at just how much pain you're in. And then you silently beg whatever deity you believe in, nay all deities, to just let you die.

This is what I have realized since I started yoga two weeks ago. This is what I have experienced since I started yoga two weeks ago.

I love it!

Laura K. Curtis said...

Women aren't MEANT to do pull-ups. And I mean that seriously. I've been working out most of my life, and I don't do pull-ups! (Of course, quite aside from the working out, I am quite overweight so there's an awful lot of me to pull up.)

I've tried Zumba, as Booklady recommended. If you like to dance, and if you have rhythm, it's fun. I am pathetic at it. Can't bring myself to take the classes because it's too embarrassing.

I really, really like kettlebells. You can find some kettlebell workouts on YouTube, or you can buy a package of DVDs and the kettlebells themselves. (I ended up going with Kettleworx.) It's quick, it's easy, and while it won't do much for your cardio/endurance, if you're looking for toning it will really help.

signlady217 said...

I hate working out! I guess that's why I don't. Haha. If I could find a type or routine(s) that I actually liked, maybe I would, but so far, bleck!

Griperang/Angela said...

Heather - I also have no workout routine - I am lazy my exercise would consist of me picking up a book or walking to the car when I take my daughter to school does that count, lol. By the way I just finished the first Lucy Valentine book this week and tonight will be starting number two with three to start as soon as I receive it. There is a group of us reading them and I love them. I don't know why I waited so long to get it read.

Books by Heather said...

Booklady, Zumba looks fun, actually. I might have to try it, though I have zero rhythm!

LOL, Aimee. That's quite a picture you paint! Not sure I'm quite up for that level of pain. :)

Thanks, Laura! I'll look into Kettlebells--haven't heard of that before. If I try Zumba, it will be in my living room. Not up for that level of public embarrassment! LOL.

Signlady, I'm with you!!!

Books by Heather said...

Griperang/Angela, thank you!!! So glad you're enjoying the Lucy series. :) We have similar tastes in exercise (and I think those "exercises" count!).

NoraA said...

Exercise? What's exercise? I have enough trouble walking around my block a few times, or a gentle stroll along Sheepshead Bay. I have two bad knees. Thankfully I have lost a little over 20lbs on Weight Watchers so maybe by RWA I'll have the energy to walk around the room meeting friends.

Dru said...

My form of exercise is to walk, however my doctor had other ideas, like join a gym.

So I joined the gym. It was cheaper to join the gym than buy a recumbent bike where the handles would become an extra closet for my clothes and things and I had no place to put said bike.

Wait for it.

The gym is literally across the little playground behind my building. I don't even have to watch for street lights. So can you guess how many times I've been to that gym that I can see through the windows from my 10th floor apartment?

Lynda said...

When I was working, I used to speed walk about 2-3 miles during my lunch time every day and then a few more in the evenings. On weekends I would usually walk 5-10 miles a day. Well....once I retired two years ago, that pretty much stopped when I moved to a area where there just aren't good walking places - I would have to drive somewhere to walk. I got a treadmill, but that is currently covered up in the room where I have my foster kitties. I can't tell you how often I say - "I really need to get started exercising again", but eight extra pounds later, I'm still saying it. And as we get older, those pounds come off MUCH slower....sigh.

Aurian said...

I am not an excercise kind of woman myself either. I only do some walking, slow walking that is ...

Books by Heather said...

Congrats, Nora! That's fabulous. And hopefully I'll be able to meet you at RWA!

LOL, Dru Ann. I think I'd be the same way. With the bike and the gym!

Lynda, 10 miles on the weekends? Wow! Our treadmill is currently collecting dust in the basement... Best laid plans, right?

Aurian, I'm pretty slow myself!

Linda McDonald said...

The Reece's Peanut Butter cup sounds good to me. :) Ah, but as for a workout, I joined a gym that I actually like. It has a circuit room, so you do an aerobics station, and then an exercise machine, back to aerobics, back to exercise machine. It's a good workout and I like it. I just need to go to the gym more often than I have been lately.

Books by Heather said...

Linda, don't Reece's always sound good? :) Circuit training sounds great--would definitely keep me from getting bored. Now just to figure out how to do it from home...

Nikki B said...

Heather -- First...pull ups are HARD! Especially for women (think center of gravity) .... and yoga....is HARD.. but good to include...however you need to cover all the bases - cardio, strength training...lots of choices and ways to design it to fit your schedule...email me-it's what I do ;)

Dru ---- you joined a GYM?! Why is it that I don't know this??

Breaunna said...

I get my daily exercise this way:
I pick up a book, I turn the pages, I pick up my spoon, I eat the ice cream! If I'm reading a hardcover I get 2 scoops of ice cream because I work extra hard!

Books by Heather said...

LOL, Nikki, I learned that gravity thing. :) I know I need to do better with exercise. I don't want to be a rickety old woman!


Breaunna, LOL. I can get behind that regimen!

Chaplain Jan said...

I've just started walking again after several years of non-activity & weight-gain. As my stamina increases (slowly, of course - I am 63 after all) I plan to add the strength-building exercises a physical therapist gave me some years back. My first day walking (3 weeks ago) I only lasted 7 minutes before I had to stop. Now I'm up to 20 - although still at a moderate pace. BYW, have you tried the mini-Reese's? They're tiny, don't have the paper cup, & just the perfect chocolate/peanut butter ratio. YUM!

Books by Heather said...

That's fantastic, Chaplain Jan! Congrats! I have a bad habit of jumping right into the thick of exercises instead of taking baby steps--I really need to rethink that. :)
Haven't tried the Reece's minis yet. They sound perfect (not a fan of the paper cup!!).

Vickie said...

I love my Wii Fit and I adore walking. I just have to keep being consistent and not let shift work get in the way....

Books by Heather said...

Vickie, keeping a schedule is so important to success--good for you for sticking with it! I've heard lots of good things about Wii Fit. I might have to try it--though I think son #2 is taking the wii to college with him...