Saturday, March 27, 2010

Not all surprises are fun

by Lorraine Bartlett / Lorna Barrett / L.L. Bartlett

Geordi You expect some things in life to always remain the same.  If there's a coolant leak, and the warp core is about to blow on the Enterprise, somehow you know that Geordi LaForge is going be able to fix it every time.  Either that, or the ship will enter a time loop and give Geordi another shot at it tomorrow.  ("Cause and Effect" one of my favorite Next Gen episodes.)

But things don't always remain the same.

Kalamata olives Take my latest venture to the grocery store.  I've been avoiding the olive bar for months.  Why?  H1N1 flu.  I read where people sneeze on olive, salad, hot food bars, and spread the flu and then you're on your back for two weeks, or, in some cases DEAD.  Being a chicken through and through, I have avoided all such food areas and their temptations.

But let's face it, the whole H1H1 flu thing was blown out of proportion, and I decided that the time had come for some delightful kalamata olives.  They're so awful, they're good!  So, gathering my courage, I picked up the industrial sized spoon and scooped up half a cup of them.

Since I arrived home just in time for lunch, I piled a bunch of them next to my ham and Swiss sandwich and sat down for my favorite meal of the day, popped one in my mouth and -- ugh!  What's that inside?  A pit?  No--it wasn't hard enough.  But it did sort of go CRUNCH when I wasn't expecting it.

Hubby bit into his first olive, and was surprised by a crunch, too.  Hmm.  Our olives weren't bad, but they didn't quite taste the same.  We decided, whatever they'd stuffed them with, we didn't like it.  So we carefully chewed around the next "soft pit" and spat it out.

The olives were not a hit.  But they weren't exactly cheap, so about a week later, I decided I really should try and eat them.  Hubby and I ate the exact same lunch -- except, I added olives to mine.

Kaopectate You just know where this story is going, right?

Can you say SICK AS A DOG?

So when I hit the grocery store the other day, I decided to see just what those olives where stuffed with.  Turns out it's garlic.  Now, I happen to LOVE garlic, but not in the middle of a kalamata olive.  And the store isn't offering any other way to buy them.

I guess I won't be buying kalamata olives for a long time.

Don't you hate it when someone messes with a perfectly good recipe and spoils it for you?  When was the last time that happened to you -- and what did someone ruin?
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