Monday, May 18, 2009

Bad Mom!

Wow. It's so good to know there are other bad moms out there. I know this because the other day I heard about a book out now that is basically a "mom confessional." I thought immediately, "I can contribute!"

So many little things I feel guilty about now, as I look back, that at the time seemed perfectly okay. Like reading a book during my son's little league game instead of watching him. Forgetting to bring my camera to take photos of my daughter when she competed in a gymnastic meet. Watching from the sidelines while the kids went on fast rides at fairs and even Disney World (mostly to keep from puking all over my shoes). Not reading "The Littlest Angel" to them because it made me cry. Cutting my infant daughter's fingernail too close and drawing blood (I cried all day.) And a list of other transgressions that I will carry to my grave feeling guilty over.

So that's why it was a relief to hear that other moms, and dads, too, I'm sure, feel the same way. I'm still trying to make up for my sins. I just returned from a five day trip to Key West with my son and daughter, both now adults but not yet married. We had a blast together, and this time I tried to memorize each moment, another thing I didn't do as a young mom, because I didn't now how fleeting those moments really are.

Weren't they just learning to crawl, to walk, to talk in sentences? Weren't they just starting kindergarten? High school? College?

I'm sure my kids are more forgiving of me than I am of myself. Still, I wish I had a "do over." I'd "do" a lot better the second time around.

Have a great week.
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