Thursday, February 13, 2014

Squirrel TV – where the fun never ends. No subscription fee!

by Mary Jane Maffini aka Victoria Abbott

Lily - glued to Squirrel TV

I rarely watch television in the day, unless I’m really sick. It’s too much of a distraction, but at any rate,  it’s no match for the entertainment in the back yard (especially if I'm fighting a deadline)  Yes, I’m talking about squirrels.  As my dogs will tell you, we have more than enough: splendid black, glamorous gray and mean little red ones.   

I will deny this if the dogs are around, but the squirrels are quite entertaining. This means that I finally got over the incident of the bushy tailed rodent that ate the blooms off every single geranium in my planters and tossed them onto the deck floor.  Squirrels don’t eat geraniums, but they understand their dramatic payoff. That’s the thing with squirrels, they seems to be actors and acrobats and so much more. They may be the next big thing after Netflix.


Here’s the kind of programming we get on Squirrel TV (SQTV) and how it matches up with what else is on. 

                Teasing small earthbound dogs (Long running sitcom) 
                We will find a way to get all that birdseed  (Action adventure)
                I’m going to chase that gal up a forty foot tree and live happily ever after (Romance)
                Tree-to-tree mogul jumps (Winter Olympics)
                Streaking along electrical wires (The Amazing Race)
                Hanging from guttering by a toenail to get at the sunflower seeds (Summer Olympics)
                Rebuilding damaged nest at minus thirty degrees (Love It or List It)

Busy black squirrel rebuilding damaged nest in minus 30 weather

These are some of the recurring characters:   
                2 big puffy grey squirrels, very glam (Lola and Mamie)
               2 small mean red squirrels (Bitey and Scratchy)
                99 very industrious black squirrels (too busy to give their names)
                Daisy and Lily – a pair of frustrated dachshunds trapped in a house by unfeeling owners
                Flocks of birds
                Put them all together and they spell hours of entertainment, free of charge, if you don’t count geraniums and bird seed.

Oh and, they're watching you too. 



Hey, you two! Get off my keyboard! How many times do I have to tell you … Oh never mind.
So, my friends, how about you? Pro or anti-squirrel?  Do you watch Squirrel TV? Do you do portraits of squirrels like Victoria has been known to?