Monday, November 19, 2012

Old house, new house, or in limbo?

by Kate Collins

Definitely in limbo. My old house is now half empty, filled only with the rooms of furniture that will not fit in my new, more compact house. My new house has my familiar stuff in it -- family room, bedroom, kitchen and laundry stuff -- but it feels like someone else's house with my belongings stuffed into it. I sleep in my familiar bed but the walls have moved in a whole lot closer and the new house smell is awfully strong. Oh, and that train that I used to hear in the distance in the old house? It's very close now and the whistle in the night is driving me crazy.

I like my new house, but it doesn't feel like home. I can't find anything in the cabinets. I can't find anything in my clothes closet. I can't find anything in my office. I'm frustrated and want to go home!

But where is home?

I'm thinking my car is looking quite appealing.

Do you have any suggestions for how to feel more comfortable in a new place?




13 comments:

  1. For us, when we moved, it was finally getting the books out on the shelves. It didn't look or feel right until then. Once they were back out and around us, everything else was minor and just a matter of time.

    ReplyDelete
  2. hey kate!
    you're in the trickiest part of the move--how not to get too freaked out by change. we all go through this emotional roller-coaster when moving. the first thing i do is arrange the big stuff--carpets, sofas, chairs, etc. pile the un-opened boxes in a space that you can't see unless you want to go there. just get all your stuff in the new house, or get rid of it or store the extra. you don't need all that "extra" stuff weighing you down. you need to feel uplifted by the change, not bogged down. THEN, the first night back some of your favorite cookies and have a nice cup of your favorite tea--mine is "good earth" classic cinnamon orange. way good. snuggle up with one of your favorite books on the sofa and exhale. imagine everything in its place and your new little nest is perfect. give the house plants a drink and wish them well in your new home. you all have a lot to adapt to. invite a new neighbor over that you don't know but looks nice, to share your cookies with. it'll be okay, really. you'll be okay, really.
    sending love and peace of mind, mary o

    ReplyDelete
  3. My unscientific hypothesis is that there are furniture people and art people. Me personally, I don't feel at home until there's art on the walls.
    Either way, don't worry--you'll feel at home before you know it!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I've moved a couple of times as an adult, the most recent being 8 years ago. I was a maniac with unpacking and getting rid of boxes, as the boxes were a sign to me of being unsettled. Getting art work, photographs, etc up was also critical to me settling in -- again, the blank walls were a sign of transition and wanted to speed right through it. I was surprised several years later, when we finally got the interior walls of our living room painted, how even more at home I felt. Decorating choices that are mine, not the prior owner's, made the house mine, too. As for finding stuff...yeah, that takes time. I switched the contents of two drawers in my kitchen so many times, I still have to open both to find my pot holders and trivets!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Time. For me it takes time, daily experiences of day to day, making new routines. Some decorative objects and some kitchen gadgets make it seem right. Probably several months to feel right. I am still looking for things at times, as we downsized also.

    Best wishes for success.

    ReplyDelete
  6. The more you return to your new home from being out and about, the more it feels like "coming home". SO, go out, do stuff, come back, and say, "I'm home." Repeat.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Great advice. Thanks!

    Meggie, I think I'm a furniture AND art person. My furniture is in place but the bare walls are screaming "You're new here! Muhahahha!"

    ReplyDelete
  8. Put up a few photos right away or maybe dig out a blanket that has sentimental value and throw in on your bed.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Be kind to yourself. Arrange one room, that gives you comfort, probably your bedroom. If possible arrange that room to remind you of the one you left. And most of all, look out your new windows at new views. Think of all the season's changing, all the new points of interest. And the idea of putting the boxes somewhere you do not see them all the time, is a great idea. But, most of all, remember, you have time to build your new nest.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I like Annette's idea. Do one room completely; I would also choose the bedroom. For me, I need. a chair near the bed for my robe, a coaster for my drink, a book and my knitting.
    You can get some heavy duty drapes to soften the train whistle. I love the sound because it's faint. Now I wish I could muffle the dog next door who barks....all..day...long.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I hope you will feel settled soon Kate.

    ReplyDelete
  12. i'm sure you will settled soon. It just takes time. All good suggestions above. For sure, your books and stuff on the walls. Good luck, maybe the Christmas tree will help!!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  13. Oh these comments are so lovingly shared. All of us can benefit from the wisdom of your fans. We all wish you well in your new home which like so many have said, will feel like home in no time at all.

    ReplyDelete