Saturday, October 4, 2008

Wedding Registries - Oh, the Avarice!

By JB

A friend of mine stopped by my cafe office at Panera the other day and showed me a wedding registry list. Her quandary was what to buy the couple (keep in mind that the groom was an acquaintance from work) and when I read the printout, I almost sprayed my mouthful of coffee all over the table.

First of all, there wasn't a single item on the list for under $100. Secondly, each place setting cost well over $200 and the flatware was sterling! Yes, for everyday use, my friends. I guess they're expecting a visit from the Queen. Every espresso maker, commercial mixer, and professional blender well exceeded the $100 minimum. I've never seen towels or sheets at such prices. (Think that Hotel brand). And the luggage! Don't even get me started.

And just in case one couldn't find somethign to buy, the option to purchase Visa gift cards was available.

The printout was 15 pages long!

Okay, here are the thoughts that ran through my mind (all at the same time):

  • What does your mama think of this? (And if she thinks it's fine, she didn't raise you right)

  • Where will you put all this stuff in a one-bedroom apartment in the city?

  • Are you aware that the country is in an economic crisis?

  • Visa gift cards for $100 a pop. Are you having a wedding to make money or to celebrate your love?

  • And more, nastier thoughts


MY friend tried to defend her coworker by citing that some cultures pass the hat or collect money for a dance wiht the bride. "True," I agreed. "But at least that's up front. You know it's coming. It's a tradition and you're willing and prepared to contribute. No one's demanding extravagance."


She asked which item she should purchase from the registry and I said, "That's up to you. If it was me, I'd buy them a salad spinner."


Have you ever seen a registry like this one? Any over-the-top wedding stories? Maybe you have one from today. After all, it is Saturday. Time to collect those Visa gift cards. :)